It’s so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of romantic emotion when you’re dating someone. It’s not uncommon to desire marriage quickly with the person you’re falling in love with. It could be just six months after dating, yet you feel ready to tie the knot right then and there. Who cares if you’re rushing into marriage when you love each other – right?
If only it were that simple. There are many factors affecting marriage that young couples perhaps don’t take into full perspective, and their marriage will suffer for it. Here are a few reasons why a couple shouldn’t rush into marriage so quickly.
3 Reasons to Avoid Rushing Into Marriage
1. Financial Instability
For one, if you and your significant other are still building your life, especially in terms of a career and finances, marriage may need to be put on hold for a little while. It’s not because your parents won’t help out if they decide to, or the fact that you’ll have a small, intimate wedding in the middle of the woods. It’s about what comes after you say “I do.”
Before you go rushing into marriage, stop and think: do either of you have the means to handle a marriage, changing licenses, insurance policies, and handling loan debt? You’re now combining your resources for two people, not one single person anymore. You’ll have to tackle financial challenges together, and think about practical issues like health insurance and paying rent. Marriage is best handled by two responsible adults who have thought about the ways that finances will affect their union.
“Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way.” —Proverbs 19:2
2. Impatience With God’s Timing
Our God is a God of perfect timing. If you know in your heart of hearts that you may be rushing into the idea of marriage, perhaps even because of external or familial pressure, think about dating for longer to give you time to stop and reflect.
Both of you may want to sprint to the altar, but is that what God wants for you right now? It’s a wonderful thing to just ask God, and He will answer you and give you peace of mind. God may be your biggest supporter for your marriage, but He may not have planned it just right now.
“But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.” —Romans 8:25
3. Looking Past The Tough Parts
Marriage is not just finally being able to live together and enjoy each other’s company without the ache of ever having to leave them; it’s so much more. It’s also a massive but beautiful responsibility. We do not know our futures or the even the sorrows they may hold.
Will you be ready to take care of your partner if, God forbid, they become seriously ill and need assistance? What about other issues that may come along, whether it be moving for work, mental illness or the death of a parent? There are many challenges you’ll face throughout your marriage, so it’s critical that you take enough time to think through your preparedness for facing those trials together.
I’m not saying that everything in your life must be settled and squared away before marriage. However, I do think it’s vital to have a reality check of what marriage could bring into your life and the responsibilities it carries aside from the beauty of being in love. To enjoy the best parts of marriage, you must also be prepared to face the difficult parts of life as a team. Rushing into marriage might feel romantic – but being prepared for your future as a spouse is what will set you up for a relationship that lasts.
You may also be interested in the alternative view: God’s Perfect Timing: Why A Short Engagement Can Work