If you’re a single parent, you’re in good company. As of 2018, there are more than 11 million single-parent families in the United States.¹ Anywhere you look, you’re likely to find another single parent. Anywhere but church, that is. Only one third of single moms attend worship services. Single dads, even less.² That’s an unfortunate statistic, because belonging at church is not a matter of marital status or having a partner in parenting. Because of the unity that comes from Christ, there’s a place for everyone in church. Here’s why single parents feeling the strain shouldn’t hesitate to take part in single parent ministry.
Single Parents Belong At Church
This is a rich promise from God, and there’s great value in knowing that you belong, no matter what. But what does belonging at church look like, practically speaking? For all people, single parents included, building community with other church members is the key to getting connected and staying connected. Even for single parents, who often have jam-packed schedules and a laundry list of responsibilities, it’s possible to get plugged into your church’s single parent ministry (which will often have more flexible schedules than other services). It’s a fast way to discover people will stick by your side through the good and the bad.
Join More Than One Group
Joining a group is a great step toward building community. You might be uncomfortable in a married couples study or a college-age singles class, but many churches have a variety of Sunday school classes or small groups, so find one that’s a good fit for you. A single parent ministry is a fast way to meet other singles in the church, but if you have the time consider branching out and making even further connections.
Consider joining a single-gender class, such as a women’s Bible study, because the members of such groups often span many age categories and phases of life. Find what connects you to others, and use that to help you select a group that you’ll fit right into. As a bonus, if you select a class that meets at the same time as your church’s youth or children’s programming, you’ll have the benefit of knowing that your kids are having fun and learning at the same time as you.
Volunteer
Volunteering is one of the best ways to feel like you belong. Serving gives you a sense of ownership in your church’s ministry and also helps you get to know others. Some single parents enjoy volunteering in the areas where their children are involved, because it provides an opportunity to bond with them. But if you find that a different area of service better meets your interests, don’t feel guilty; it’s good for your children to see that you are using your abilities to serve, even if it doesn’t involve them.
Consider your schedule as well as your talents, and try to select an area where you can help on a regular basis. Not only is consistency beneficial for your church, but also, the more you are involved in a volunteer position, the more it will help you plug into your church community. Look for areas where you can offer your expertise, too: if your church doesn’t have a single parent ministry, for instance, consider talking to the leadership about how you could be involved in starting a program.
Seek A Church That’s A Good Fit For You
If you want to get connected with other one-parent families, but don’t have the time to set up the program yourself, think about seeking out a church with a thriving single parent ministry. Not only can joining an established program help you meet other parents who might deal with situations similar to yours, it also can be a great resource for support. Some of these ministries offer free programs that are especially useful for single parents, such as home repairs, oil changes and babysitting nights.
Developing deep friendships and building a support system at church does take time, but the sooner you jump into church life, the sooner you’ll develop a sense of community with the others around you. Even if you’re feeling stretched thin with parental responsibilities and other obligations, it’s worth investing time toward getting plugged in. In time, the payoff will be a strong support system that is there for both you and your children, as well as the confident assurance that your family is a valuable part of your church, where you most certainly belong.
You might also be interested in: Why Being A Single Mother Can Be A Surprising Way To Find Joy
Sources:
¹ Single Mother Statistics – Single Mother Guide
² Why the Church Needs Single Parents, and Single Parents Need the Church
