If you’re dating people and you find yourself changing your behavior for them, or even changing your overall personality, you’ve probably fallen in the trap of what I call “dating identity.” It just means that you’ve found it hard to stand up for yourself while dating, that you’ve somewhat lost yourself in the process. Here’s why it’s important to recognize this behavior, nip it in the bud, and stay true to yourself while dating.
God Knows You
When the right person comes along, you will know who you are and they will love that part of you that God sees. Too many people change too many things about themselves, thinking it will finally attract the right one, when all along, God knows them already! He’s already picked someone for the real you, not the mutable you!
It’s your job to remain true to yourself when dating, to keep the faith and to delight in the Father. Those who love Jesus will always be attractive because of their pure and mighty faith in The One who saves. Don’t settle for someone who needs you to change your personality: hold out for God’s match for you.
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” —Proverbs 13:20
It’s also important to stay true to yourself while dating so you don’t waste all of your time wasting constantly try to change yourself. Maybe I need to go for the minimalist look, or the bohemian look and that’ll attract the right-looking guy? Maybe I need to be less serious, or more serious? Am I too outgoing, or not outgoing enough? Maybe I just need a whole new makeover?
While it’s not wrong to treat yourself to a makeover, it’s never okay to makeover your character. That’s the part of you that makes you YOU. And if you’re always looking to please others, you’ll have wasted so much time trying to fit in or change yourself for the right person that you may have missed them in the process. Your perfect match is someone who loves you for you, not for what they want you to be.
Stay True To Yourself Throughout It All
God is all for growing character and strength, but He’s not an advocate for changing your ways just to find the one. So, stay true to yourself, who you are and the beautiful qualities that you withhold. No one else has those same qualities, and the right person will see the beauty in the real you.
You may also be interested in: Does God Pick Your Spouse? How Involved Is He In Finding The One?