Anyone dating after 30 and beyond will tell you how different the landscape is from the dating scene in their 20s. It isn’t just a matter of environmental changes—even though you may live in a different city, hang out with different crowds, and use different kinds of technology, there are more fundamental changes that result in a very different dating experience.
Understanding the scope of these dating differences can help you prepare for the dating world when you re-enter it after a period of removal due to marriage, career focus, or other circumstances. Here’s what changes when you’re dating after 30.
Your Priorities Are Different
The type of mate you’re looking for in your 30s is probably different than your ideal partner in your 20s. While these exact details will vary from person to person, generally those dating after 30 will have a clearer picture of their ideal mate while younger daters have a more ambiguous picture. For instance, you may find that you’re prioritizing family plans more than you used to. You’re also likely looking for more signs of career and financial stability, and are less picky about little personality quirks that might be deal breakers earlier on.
You Know the Red Flags
In the early days of dating, you fell in love without hesitation. You didn’t have the life experience to spot the unsuitable partners before getting emotionally involved. However, dating after 30 often means dating with some life lessons under your belt, and so you’ll be much more privy to the red flags. Not only are you wiser the second time around, if you’re dating after a life event like divorce, you may have kids in the picture – meaning you have to be more attuned to red flags than ever.
You Have More Responsibilities
All those life lessons do have a purpose: they make you stronger and more capable to survive a breakup or persevere anything life throws at you. So, chances are that you have your life together more when you re-enter the dating scene as a 30-something. You might have a demanding career, one or more children, or other significant responsibilities in your life. The point is, dating is never your first priority. It’s just one nice thing in your life rather than the only thing.
You’re More Straightforward
Asking someone out on a date when you’re young is an awkward, coy affair, but once you’re a little older, the whole process becomes much more blunt and straightforward. It’s one of the main things you’ll know about yourself when dating after 30 and beyond – you’re much more willing to be upfront with your intentions, for better or for worse.
You’re Okay With Nights In
When you’re young, you want to go out—and even if you don’t, you know everybody else is going out, so you feel pressured to go out. When you’re a little older, you (and your potential partners) are all a little more comfortable with spending the night in or turning in before midnight. That means dating after 30 is ideal for anyone who loves dating that involves a quiet meal and fine conversation.
The dating world might be different when you’re over 30, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less fun—in fact, if you go in prepared, many people find dating after 30 even more enjoyable experience than dating in their 20s. Get involved and live it up!
You may also be interested in: 6 Signs You’re Ready To Start Getting Back Into Dating
About the author: Sheila Blagg is a Divorce Mediator certified through the Ohio Supreme courts. She writes about online dating and life after divorce. You can follow her on Twitter.
